Instead of talking only about December 2018, I will talk about the whole year. I wrote a short one on my Instagram account, but now it’s time to detail a bit. To be totally honest, this year 2018 wasn’t the best one.
From a point of view …
Personally, 2018 was really bad. I started the year in a relationship with a man I thought I was in love with. After spending time thinking we could be happy together, I watched myself ruining all of it. Too coward to leave, I pushed him to be hateful.
I spent the next months crying this relationship. It’s always hard to explain without speaking too much about it. But basically, relationship can show who you are. In your best but also in your worse. And this one, showed me a me I really don’t want to see again.
Now that I am really far from all of it, I can say that I am grateful because I learned a lot. In every fail, you learn something and you grow up and you leave it with something really positive in your hand. So yeah, I learned a lot, but at what cost ?
2018 was a big turn for me, talking about friendship. I met my neighbor, which is my closest friend here. And I also realized that living six hours flight far from your homeland make you think about your friendship in a new way. In Kuwait, I have to forget my past because, basically, nobody knows it. Nobody has an idea about who I was before today. It’s a real fresh start.
It’s good to be a new person, because I am not stuck anymore in people’s expectations. Nobody know who I was in high school or at university. I am new and fresh. So, I have to be the girl I am without thinking about my past and experiences I had. It’s hard sometimes, because I don’t have any excuses anymore to do shitty things !
I am still a teacher in KG2. I have more pleasure doing this job, day after day. I love to work with kids, I grow up and I learn a lot with them.
Otherwise I don’t think I will do this job for the rest of my life. I think it’s a really hard and tiring job. It attacks directly your nerves. To pay attention every seconds, in that noise, makes the days really hard, sometimes.
I am used to put my personal troubles on the side when I go to work. But sometimes, even if you don’t want it, it affects your work. You are sad, you are tired and you can’t do your job 100%. It’s fine, you do it 95%, it’s ok. But with kids, it’s not allowed. You can’t be tired or sad, because they feel everything and they are too young to deal with your feelings. So basically, more you need to be alone, more they will show you attention.
2018 : a year full of new things.
So, I spent the first six months of the year being in pause. Like you pause a movie to go to the bathroom, I pressed pause on my life but time keeps going. For summer, I went to France.
This summer started in a bad way. I had an appointment at the bank and this appointment made me think about why I was in Kuwait. I spent the three first years of my life here thinking about saving money without living my life. This year, I decided that it wasn’t a big deal with I didn’t save money at all. Not a big deal if I end the year with a lot of souvenirs but no euros on my bank account. So I decided to do things I really love to do.
Beginning of Liz in Kuwait
I write blogs on Internet for years now. At some point in my life, they paid me to write articles. To write is a part of me and it’s something I do for a long time. So to start blogging seriously was the next step. And I want to be a better writer.
But obviously, its harder than we think. You have to write articles, promote it, build a community and the most important : trying to not go everywhere.
Since we never write only for ourself, I can share with you my really (humble) statistics. I posted my first article the 27 of august 2018. Since that day, this blog is :
- 3 430 visitors
- 9 310 views
- 259 comments
- Two times on the Une of HelloCoton
- Four interviews published (BlogExpat – France-Expat – TheFrenchHat – FocusExpat in English)
- A lot of messages from futures expats in Kuwait.
So thank you for reading me, commenting and sharing your thoughts with me.
I think I don’t really mind to be read by a lot of people. But I am really happy to share my adventure and my life in this mysterious country. Every time I receive a text from someone who is coming to Kuwait, I think that this blog was a brilliant idea.
My collaborations with photographers.
I think it’s my biggest pride of 2018. I am really really shy, not really comfortable in front of cameras. As everybody I think, I take selfies because I can control everything. I know how to look at the camera and how to pose.
But I literally run away from every cameras I see. I don’t know what to do with my legs and with my hands when someones tries to take a picture of me. And I always hate the result. A morning, Sethu, a photographer in Kuwait, contacted me for a collaboration. I told myself I will try. And we ended up with my favorite picture ever.
After this first experience, a lot of photographers contacted me. Kuwait is so small that all the communities are small too. But I decided to collaborate with Yasser, another photographer.
And a lot of accomplishments
In 2010, straight after a break up, I decided that, every year, I will do something new. This then, it was always about travels : I went to New York, Thaïland, Vietnam, Laos, Cambodia, Morocco, Iran, Lebanon, Bali, Brazil, Abu Dhabi, Bahrein, Cyprus… This year, I didn’t visit any new country.
I spent my year thinking about where is home. I went again to Thailand and Bali to see if you could find home again. A few times, I went to France. And my conclusion is that home is everywhere and nowhere at the same time. And it doesn’t matter.
Otherwise, if I have to remember only one thing about 2018, it would be the half-marathon for sure. I can also talk about the fact that I quit smoking, I also started rollerblading and I made hard choices. But I was proud of every choices I made.
And for 2019 ?
in 2019, I will keep doing all the work I do on myself to control all the empathy I have. I have to keep protecting myself from other’s feelings.
I will continue this blog, will do more photoshoots and travel more and more… And I also keep having fun, sharing my projects and my thoughts. I realized in 2018 that I couldn’t keep my things for myself.
I need to talk about my experiences and share it. Its not hard for me to talk about my difficulties and try to understand it in front of people. My biggest project for 2019 is to start a YouTube channel.
But… I will, as usual, just trust the life and accept what she can gives me. There is a whole world to discover and no wall to make me stuck somewhere. This year, actually, I am not building any walls.
And I wish you the best new year ever !